This dude pops out of NOWHERE; his first mail, in its entirety, follows:
I am sorry, I am no MBA et.
If you are mad about MBA's I may pursue it part-time from a nice college.
Otherwise, please let me know where I fail to meet your expectation.
adios
My reply:
Umm actually you seem to be looking for marriage. Which isnt what I'm interested in. So *shrug*
PS- I haven't mentioned anything about an MBA in my profile.... What's with that!?
He replies:
adios
Tuesday, December 30, 2008
From: ShonuXXX
hi m 26yrs old frm mumbai. came through profile u r jst mind blowin n one more thing plz dnt feel bad u look beauty m praisin god for his hand made beauty u r so sweet plz dnt mind. i love listnin to music, travellin, swimmin, fisih, pumpin n all extra activities. liked your name butter chicken.
n whtz ya real name?
Allergic to 'G', are we?
n whtz ya real name?
Allergic to 'G', are we?
From: BigshotOnline
YOU HAVE WRITTEN TO THE NTH DEGREE OF COMMONSENSE AND MORE OF HUMANITY WHICH I FEEL IS THE GREATEST POINT OF MAKING ME WRITE YOU,M NOT MARRIED THO M 39,NEVER FOUND ANYONE INTERESTING IN LIFE,THE ONE I FOUND MADE ME REALISE NO MONEY NO GIRLS,SO HERE I AM ON THE PATH OF BEING A MULTI MULTI M..........E,PEOPLE NEVER SAY BUT ITS ALWAYS MONEY ON THEIR MINDS,MONEY ACCORDING TO ME HAS NO IMPORTANCE,I FEEL THE MORE U GIVE THE RICHER YOU ARE,NOT IN TERMS OF MONEY,FROM ANYTHING TO EVERYTHING,EXCEPT YOUR OWN VALUES,I CAN COMPROMISE TO THE MAX EXTENT BUT IT HAS TO BE REASONABLE,HUMOUR IS MY SURVIVAL,I FEEL LIFE WITHOUT HUMOUR IS USELESS,EVERY MOMENT IN LIFE IS HUMOUR,WE DONT WANT TO SEE HOW GOD MADE THIS WORLD AND WE HUMANS ARE SO EGOISTIC THAT WE WANT TO CHALLENGE EVERY CREATION HE HAS MADE,SUCHA JOKE,WELL THATS ME,DONT STRESS TO WRITE IF ITS DRAGGING UR BRAINS,AND GOOD LUCK FOR UR BUSINESS,THUMBS UP.AND HEY I NEVER ANSWER QUESTIONS,I LOVE TO PROVE MYSELF IN WHAT EVER I HAVE COMMITED.
MY DREAM..... BEING IN THE FORBES MAGAZINE ONE DAY. :-)
MY DREAM..... BEING IN THE FORBES MAGAZINE ONE DAY. :-)
From: Various (Curious about Bisexuality!)
From: I_am_Sam:
Tell me more about the bisexual part
From: RoyPocker:
a Indian bisexual or i would love to meet you
so what kind of guy u looking for
I'll keep adding to this list as I sift---- Indian men are effin' FASCINATED by bisexuality/homosexuality. A while ago, one of these creeps mails me out of the blue, "wat do you homos do?" WTF?!
Tell me more about the bisexual part
From: RoyPocker:
a Indian bisexual or i would love to meet you
so what kind of guy u looking for
I'll keep adding to this list as I sift---- Indian men are effin' FASCINATED by bisexuality/homosexuality. A while ago, one of these creeps mails me out of the blue, "wat do you homos do?" WTF?!
From: Various (Friendshipping Posts)
Fishermen18:
Hi, like to make friendship with u if feel so reply.
Cool_Boy_13:
Sub: wanna make frnshp
Hi,
My name is prince just new comer for pune.
Looking for some good frds.
Can we frds?
If yes than share ur contact info with me.
Prince
From: Samik_G
hi,do u want to make friend ship with me?
I'll keep adding Fransheepers here---- they're far too numerous for each to have a post!
Hi, like to make friendship with u if feel so reply.
Cool_Boy_13:
Sub: wanna make frnshp
Hi,
My name is prince just new comer for pune.
Looking for some good frds.
Can we frds?
If yes than share ur contact info with me.
Prince
From: Samik_G
hi,do u want to make friend ship with me?
I'll keep adding Fransheepers here---- they're far too numerous for each to have a post!
From: Joy
Mail 1:
liked your all the tests you have taken.U looks to be quite intelligent.I have added you in my favorite list.Hope you would do the same.Reply.
See u,
Joy
6 Minutes Later, Mail 2:
Hello,I have not Up loaded my Pics .I will send it to u when you will ask for.
My mail id. is XXX.XXXXX@yahho.co.in
Bye
joy
Mail 3 arrives 11 days later:
Hello,
i m Joy.I want to be friend of yours.Yes my pics are not there but I can send it.You can go through my profile. I stay in western suburbs.Take care.
Bye.
Joy
liked your all the tests you have taken.U looks to be quite intelligent.I have added you in my favorite list.Hope you would do the same.Reply.
See u,
Joy
6 Minutes Later, Mail 2:
Hello,I have not Up loaded my Pics .I will send it to u when you will ask for.
My mail id. is XXX.XXXXX@yahho.co.in
Bye
joy
Mail 3 arrives 11 days later:
Hello,
i m Joy.I want to be friend of yours.Yes my pics are not there but I can send it.You can go through my profile. I stay in western suburbs.Take care.
Bye.
Joy
From: Indian Tiger
Hi there . . . This is Mandy (Manoj) from Mumbai . . . I'm 26 and a easy going person . . . I'm new on this site and would like to make friends. . . can we be friends ???
When I grow up, I wanna be a non-playable character in a PS2 game too!
Interesting factoid I'd never know without Wikipedia: Mandy means 'worthy of love'....
When I grow up, I wanna be a non-playable character in a PS2 game too!
Interesting factoid I'd never know without Wikipedia: Mandy means 'worthy of love'....
From: Kundan_Fun
Mail 1:
Hi Sweety. I'm Kundan. I wanna be your friend & pass some good time with you & share everything.
Please be my friend.
Do reply me....
Precisely a month later, Mail 2:
Hi. I'm Kundan. I'm a mechanical engineer & presently i'm working as a design engineer for industrial machines. I stay in Bombay. I really don't have so much friends. Actually I'm tired of diplomatic friends in my life. So I just wanna pass some good time & share something with you. I also wanna know you.
If you are really interested & think it's ok, please do reply me.
I'm waiting for your reply....
3 minutes after that, Mail 3:
Hi, How are you?
I'm Kundan from Mumbai. I'm a Design Engineer for industrial machines. What do you do?
Hi Sweety. I'm Kundan. I wanna be your friend & pass some good time with you & share everything.
Please be my friend.
Do reply me....
Precisely a month later, Mail 2:
Hi. I'm Kundan. I'm a mechanical engineer & presently i'm working as a design engineer for industrial machines. I stay in Bombay. I really don't have so much friends. Actually I'm tired of diplomatic friends in my life. So I just wanna pass some good time & share something with you. I also wanna know you.
If you are really interested & think it's ok, please do reply me.
I'm waiting for your reply....
3 minutes after that, Mail 3:
Hi, How are you?
I'm Kundan from Mumbai. I'm a Design Engineer for industrial machines. What do you do?
From: Stan_For_Love
Subject: Hi BitterChicken
Body:
oops, too much butter to hold tongue tight.
Hey hv do u get time 2 do all the stuff penned in ur profile.
Life is beautiful jus let it go !! fill the air as u breath is my motto!!! n i em happy(snappy).
doggy @ never !!
i love cats, wild as they r, yet cute killers.
wanna be friend !! it won't hurt !! GOD-PROMISE
smile pliz ####
Body:
oops, too much butter to hold tongue tight.
Hey hv do u get time 2 do all the stuff penned in ur profile.
Life is beautiful jus let it go !! fill the air as u breath is my motto!!! n i em happy(snappy).
doggy @ never !!
i love cats, wild as they r, yet cute killers.
wanna be friend !! it won't hurt !! GOD-PROMISE
smile pliz ####
From: Tunji69
hi
i luv to eat full butter chicken wid all da gravey :P
one tnhig more i liked in u dat u r a dog in fem body :P lets meet yaar i really ned a person like u for fun
barf
i luv to eat full butter chicken wid all da gravey :P
one tnhig more i liked in u dat u r a dog in fem body :P lets meet yaar i really ned a person like u for fun
barf
From: VeryHotRahul786
hi, i am rahul live in delhi,i am just alone in my life i am a buissnesman i have my own firm of export,i am working with my dad he is the chairman of our firm,i am very hard working person,my best things are always within my circle, except my love. that is yet to come. i can wait any long of time for a true love. i have seen true love sometimes creating history, i dont wanna create any kind of history but rather a good peaceful life..iam very excited to know more about you,plz send me mail on...... XXXXX.XXXXX786@hotmail.com
'Nuff said...
For those wondering about 786, it's used as a substitute for Bismillah ("In the name of Allah" or "In the name of God" in the Indian subcontinent, and is commonly believed to bring luck.
'Nuff said...
For those wondering about 786, it's used as a substitute for Bismillah ("In the name of Allah" or "In the name of God" in the Indian subcontinent, and is commonly believed to bring luck.
From: FunkySexyHunk
Mail1:
hi darling u look cool..n sexy n funky i feel we can connect m 33 funky guy in andheri...my id is XXXXXXXXXXXX@yahoo.com..check my profile
if u r kinda interested do msg me i wil give u my cell no add my yahoo id and we can chat n talk..wud u wanna talk over..meet over
since u r out here i understand that u wud be like me interested in romance love
affection passion and many other things where r u in bombay..do tell melllove vishal
Precisely 1 minute later:
Mail 2:
do reply darling..love vishal
I'm terribly interested in romance love affection passion. My profile, however, clearly states I'm getting all of it from one person and not looking to add suppliers.
Also, please tell me how I can get in touch with Mellove, since s/he is the person I'm supposed to reply to. Space bar is your FRIEND! Capitalization is tax free. You've got the correct number of punctuation marks, but they sadly huddle together for warmth and protection, rather than going forth where duty calls them.
Don't make me a grammar Nazi. Please...
hi darling u look cool..n sexy n funky i feel we can connect m 33 funky guy in andheri...my id is XXXXXXXXXXXX@yahoo.com..check my profile
if u r kinda interested do msg me i wil give u my cell no add my yahoo id and we can chat n talk..wud u wanna talk over..meet over
since u r out here i understand that u wud be like me interested in romance love
affection passion and many other things where r u in bombay..do tell melllove vishal
Precisely 1 minute later:
Mail 2:
do reply darling..love vishal
I'm terribly interested in romance love affection passion. My profile, however, clearly states I'm getting all of it from one person and not looking to add suppliers.
Also, please tell me how I can get in touch with Mellove, since s/he is the person I'm supposed to reply to. Space bar is your FRIEND! Capitalization is tax free. You've got the correct number of punctuation marks, but they sadly huddle together for warmth and protection, rather than going forth where duty calls them.
Don't make me a grammar Nazi. Please...
From: PeterMystical
I just want to board a plane now and fly to India to....
have a butter chicken!
Look at my profile and if it makes 'click' you know what to do.
By the way, I know about 25 different ways to eat butter chicken.....
If it makes 'click', 'screech' or 'grind', I give it to the repairman.
All his profile detailed was his skills in cunnilingus. It sadly, didn't make '(c)lick'.
have a butter chicken!
Look at my profile and if it makes 'click' you know what to do.
By the way, I know about 25 different ways to eat butter chicken.....
If it makes 'click', 'screech' or 'grind', I give it to the repairman.
All his profile detailed was his skills in cunnilingus. It sadly, didn't make '(c)lick'.
From: Loveme724
hiiiiiiiiiii
i wana sex with u in new year, what is u r plane, lets have fun.......................................
Lets go about this systematically.
Wana
Wana may refer to one of the following:
plane, in mathematics, flat surface of infinite extent but no thickness. An example of a plane, or more exactly of a bounded portion of a plane, is the surface forming one face, or side, of a cube. A plane is determined, or defined, by any of the following: (1) three points not in a straight line; (2) a straight line and a point not on the line; (3) two intersecting lines; or (4) two parallel lines. Two straight lines in space do not usually lie in the same plane. For a given plane in space, a line can either lie outside and parallel to it, intersect the plane in a single point, or lie entirely in the plane; if more than one point of a straight line lies in the plane, then the entire line must lie in the plane.
Source: www.reference.com
In answer, I don't want to have sex with a sea urchin in the new year.
My plane? I don't think that it's fair to keep a pet plane in a city like Bombay--- there's so little space to put a flat surface of infinite extent and no thickness. However, I volunteer at plane shelters often and donate annually
i wana sex with u in new year, what is u r plane, lets have fun.......................................
Lets go about this systematically.
Wana
Wana may refer to one of the following:
- The Hawaiian name for the Sea urchin (pronounced as vana)
- Wana (Pakistan), a city in Pakistan
- Wana (Pronounced "Qu-ah-Nah") was a cleaning woman at SAR Academy, in Riverdale, New York. She now owns a school and has her own TV show, "Tuesdays With Wana"
- [[Wana (Telecommunications), a telecommunications company in Morocco
- Wana, West Virginia
- W.A.N.A., Wireless Amateur Network of Amaliada, established in Amaliada City, Greece.
plane, in mathematics, flat surface of infinite extent but no thickness. An example of a plane, or more exactly of a bounded portion of a plane, is the surface forming one face, or side, of a cube. A plane is determined, or defined, by any of the following: (1) three points not in a straight line; (2) a straight line and a point not on the line; (3) two intersecting lines; or (4) two parallel lines. Two straight lines in space do not usually lie in the same plane. For a given plane in space, a line can either lie outside and parallel to it, intersect the plane in a single point, or lie entirely in the plane; if more than one point of a straight line lies in the plane, then the entire line must lie in the plane.
Source: www.reference.com
In answer, I don't want to have sex with a sea urchin in the new year.
My plane? I don't think that it's fair to keep a pet plane in a city like Bombay--- there's so little space to put a flat surface of infinite extent and no thickness. However, I volunteer at plane shelters often and donate annually
Labels:
plane,
sea urchin,
sex,
wanton repetition of last alphabet
From: Kumar2207
I am single male from mumbai
i seen ur profile very nice, i like you,
i want to make friendship with you.
I have own Car also we can go out side Mumbai
Would u like to make friendship with me?
please give reply or call me on my number 99694XXXXX
Mind you, this guy's profile pic was an erect penis.
I like how 'Mumbai' isn't capitalized, but 'car' is.
I think I want to make friendship with his car.
Edit:
I just HAD to post the text of his profile.....
Hell dearI. take one chance i very hot wat happen would u like I am single male from mumbai i like casual relation,
relation keep in very secrete would u like to meet me feel free call me on 99694XXXXX call me faqst whne i meet u wat r u thingkinI
i seen ur profile very nice, i like you,
i want to make friendship with you.
I have own Car also we can go out side Mumbai
Would u like to make friendship with me?
please give reply or call me on my number 99694XXXXX
Mind you, this guy's profile pic was an erect penis.
I like how 'Mumbai' isn't capitalized, but 'car' is.
I think I want to make friendship with his car.
Edit:
I just HAD to post the text of his profile.....
Hell dearI. take one chance i very hot wat happen would u like I am single male from mumbai i like casual relation,
relation keep in very secrete would u like to meet me feel free call me on 99694XXXXX call me faqst whne i meet u wat r u thingkinI
Labels:
capitalization,
car,
friendship,
penis,
punctuation
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)